My life really is Harry Potter

First off, I just want you all to know that my friend Andrew wrote this at 11:45 pm on Friday night. It is amazing.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione meet Lindsay, Jarilyn, and Raymon: An Analysis

Disclaimer: I was asked to match Harry, Ron, and Hermione with Lindsay, Jarylin, and Raymon. I had three characters and three people. This does not mean that the three people match perfectly to the three characters from the Harry Potter series in personality, talents, or interests. It simply means that they were the best choices considering my options. Also, this comparison is almost entirely spoiler-free. Sometime I would like to write one with plenty of details from the book, which would be more fun. That said, let the analysis begin.

Hermione—the public seems most eager to find why I selected Raymon as Hermione. Since making this designation, I have witnessed the following, all of which affirmed my assertion:

· Jarilyn and Lindsay left class. Raymon wanted to go, but his academic conscience got the better of him, and he stayed

· Raymon finished his budgeting trends paper before anyone else, and then helped those struggling with the concepts.

· Raymon recently felt anxiety due to mounting schoolwork

· Raymon did not go to some sort of social venture competition with Lindsay because of the aforementioned anxiety

· Raymon and Jarilyn (Hermione) have this flirty-abusey relationship

Other observations that make Raymon the most likely Hermione:

· Raymon shows general concern for others

· Raymon is actively involved in finding solutions to problems, even if he doesn’t get the credit for them

· Raymon is a good listener

· Raymon’s patronus is an otter

· Raymon would probably start an advocacy nonprofit (501(c)4) to protect animal rights, if animals were treated like house elves

And now, some key differences between the two:

· Raymon is a boy.

· Raymon has short hair

· Raymon doesn’t bicker with Jarilyn

· Raymon doesn’t have a cat (to my knowledge)

Ron—I have received the most complaints over this choice, particularly from Jarilyn herself. Here’s why she’s Ron:

· Jarilyn’s complained a lot about being Ron

· Her quirky sense of humor is somewhat infectious

· Jarilyn comes from a large family

· Jarilyn is very loyal. She’s traveled to New York multiple times to visit investigators from her mission. She would definitely go into the Dark Forest, giant spiders and all, if it meant helping a friend in need.

· Jarilyn enjoys sports

· Jarilyn has red hair

· Jarilyn and Raymon (Hermione) have this flirty-abusey relationship

· Jarilyn will speak her mind, even if it’s a direct complaint to a professor

· While Jarilyn performs just fine in school, she is somewhat incredulous of over-achievers

· Jarilyn is prone to occasional sarcastic remarks, usually used for humorous as opposed to mean-spirited purposes

Now some of the key differences, to make an unbiased comparison:

· Jarilyn is a girl

· Jarilyn isn’t jealous of Lindsay

· Jarilyn is much nicer than Ron

· Jarilyn is not vulgar

· Jarilyn is not clumsy

· Jarilyn is a good student, and enjoys school

· Jarilyn’s patronus is a jack rabbit

Harry—finally, the analysis of Harry has arrived. In all reality, I felt that the other two matched best, and that Lindsay and Harry were the last options, so they ended up as a match. As I told Lindsay, my opinion of her is much higher than my opinion of Harry (excluding his extraordinary change in the seventh book (particularly after Malfoy Manor . . . the beautiful scene that follows changes Harry forever—okay, back to the analysis). Reasons why:

· Lindsay is athletic, and apparently a wiz on the racquetball court

· Lindsay is a deep thinker

· Lindsay brings people together

· Lindsay keeps her head up above mounting pressures

· Lindsay has brown hair

· Lindsay has a lightning bolt scar in her forehead

· Lindsay lives far away from her parents

· Lindsay looks up to the MPA professors, and seeks to learn from them

· Lindsay has a healthy, noticeable spirituality about her

· Lindsay loves fighting evil and getting other people on her side

· Lindsay is auror material

· Lindsay gets along great with both Jarilyn and Raymon, even if they’ve been bickering

Why this isn’t the best match? Here goes:

· Lindsay is a girl

· Lindsay is not obnoxious for about 200 pages in “The Order of the Phoenix”

· Lindsay is not destined to confront and defeat He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named herself (or if she is, she hasn’t told me)

· Lindsay doesn’t get riled up over every little thing, making her scar prickle

· Lindsay keeps the honor code

So there you have it, for what it’s worth.